Still in holiday mood

[OneRepublic - Stop And Stare]

I hate this feeling. This extremely zho boh lan feeling. Perhaps it's the fact that I'm looking forward to my return to NYC (in 4 hours!)... I accomplished nothing this week and I hate it. Didn't even manage to finish a single homework. Argh. And I'm back on Menthol Lights. After slightly more than 1/2 a year of abstaining from cigarettes ('cept for the occasional stick or two), I'm packing packs regularly again. This makes me wonder... Is it because of the recent influence of city life or is that just a stupid excuse for my not-so-strong will?

Well, once this trip is over, it's back to serious mugging again. There's really not much left of the semester to slack around.

Meanwhile, I can't stop thinking if Vera received the postcard I sent and if she did, what will her reaction be? Would she just roll her eyes and throw it away on the spot? Or would the postcard strike a chord deep within her heart? Perhaps she might have tore it up in disgust. Soon it'd be the 2nd anniversary of my broken heart and I've yet to find my "one true love" nor the cure to my wrecked heart. Somehow, I think that it's God's way of helping me with my studies. He knows how distracted I can be...

Stop and stare
I think I'm moving, but I go nowhere
Yeah, I know that everyone gets scared
But I've become what I can't be

Stop and stare
You start to wonder why you're here not there
And you'd give anything to get what's fair
But fair ain't what you really need
Oh, can you see what I see