Lord, I'd failed you (again)

[As The Deer]

I can't help but look back and feel a sense of let down. To many people, I might be the guy blessed with a well to do daddy, sent to Australia to pursue my bachelors because I couldn't get into NUS and now on exchange in the United States having a whale of a time. Many do not know the responsibilities I carry on my shoulders. To me, I carry the responsibilities of the eldest son and a dear brother. I have to strive to make my parents proud and to set a decent example to my sister. Somehow, I believe I carry the hope of my friends as well. I feel even my secondary school shares the same hope. The hope that I'd do well and make everyone proud. And of course, as the child of God, I strive to make the best of myself.

But today... today, I look back and I think I'd failed. This entire academic year (both in ANU and UNC) has been totally wasted. I blame nobody else but me. All the energy, concern and money that had been spent on me has gone down the drain, washed away by the rain from the thunderstorm that I'd created. So once again, I ask for the strength, faith and wisdom to overcome this difficult time.

And to all, I'm sorry that I've disappointed you...