Pui! Kanna Sai...

[Mark Joseph - Get Through]

Bear with me people, this is yet another bitching entry...

WAH RAO! That stupid Shogan... Please people of boring Canberra, don't ever patronise that place. Regardless how cheap their teppanyaki seems, it's not worth it. And even if you're thinking of going there for some other dishes, I seriously urge you to think again.

It was supposed to be a treat for Rus from Amelia and myself (for attaining our academic goals last semester). Kexin suggested jimmy's in Dickson and I really should have heed her advice. But who knows? I examined Shogan from the 1st floor while Amelia was drawing money. It looked like a pretty decent place, deco looked authentic enough and the menu seems okay.

When I entered, the first thing that caught my eye was the female boss. I gave all the waitresses a quick scan. WAH PIANG! KNN! All fucking PRC. If you'd tried any of the Sizzle bento branches in Canberra, you too would boycott all pseudo Japanese eataries. I'm fine if the waitresses are not as chio as Iori's. After all, I'm going to have my dinner, not a KTV session at 天安门 or 新天地.

"Ok, nevermind. Don't be too quick to judge. Plus I'd a wonderful day earlier," I told myself. "$30 for a teppanyaki set course. Got fish, chicken and beef. Maybe we should also have some starters." And so we had a large sashimi set, age dashi tofu and 3 sets of that $30 teppanyaki set course. I really regret I never bring camera man. If not I can show you all how small the sashimi is and how dirty the tofu looked. Sashimi is supposed to melt in your mouth. KNN, Shogan one still got tendon. Simi melt in your mouth, still must bite and chew. And the pieces are so tiny. Really, even Sake Sushi sashimi also don't have so small loh. Fucking niao man. And the tofu... it's not crisp and golden. It's (slightly) tough, warm (not hot) and brown. It's so obvious that they the oil they used is fucking dirty lah. Either that or the tofu don't know fried how many thousand times liao. I mean if your food is not presentable nevermind, but it's not just unpresentable, it tastes as horrible as it looks. At that point I knew it was a good choice that I didn't order my Asahi. KNN, give them the opportunity to earn 200% profit? No way! Pui!

My expectation for the teppanyaki was no doubt discounted. There was a group of Aussies sharing our table and they arrived first so the chef started cooking their meal first. The fish got no aluminium boat nevermind, wah lao the way he cook is just fucking funny lah. Like mah ciam waiting for the fish to be chao tah. Horrible horrible. And the garlic. He never even cook until chao tah. Should chao tah one he never, then never chao tah one he want to make it chao tah. And I don't know simi lan jiao fish they use. Argh. Then the chicken... Where got people used chicken that has been seasoned with fucking flour in teppanyaki? Maybe in their kampong lah. Needless to say the chicken wasn't nice. What about the beef you asked. The beef was BLACK. Fresh raw beef is supposed to be 鲜艳, you know, bloody red. KNN, the beef they use has parts that is like grey-ish black. So yucky leh. Oh and while he was cooking the beef, he made a big fire. Fucking action... The fire is made to cook the beef. But you know where is his fire? Beside the beef. KNN, you tell me he action or not? Talk about action, I must tell you what he did with the fried egg that's meant for the fried rice? He tried to throw it into the Aussies' mouth. Talk about waste of food. If that's not enough, he tried to flip pieces of egg into their plate. DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH EGG HE WASTED? And It's not like he used a lot of eggs leh. Fried rice meant for 11 people you guess he crack how many eggs? 2! 2 fucking eggs!!! Can you believe it?! Argh...

To me, a teppanyaki meal is more than a meal. It's a meal where you not only enjoy the finest of your food but also your chef's excellent culinary skills. That fucker just tarnished the art lah. He made teppanyaki no difference eating takeaway at Moscow Circus. That fucking Shogan really just tarnished the Japanese culture man. I think they should go for the 拯救贫穷大挑战. Let them try some authentic teppanyaki and let the real chef kan kan them a while then see how they cry. They should be fucking ashamed of themselves. Really! I feel very cheated for all the patrons that night. It was beyond the horrible food or the unfreshness of it or the lousy culinary skills. It was about how low the operators of Shogan had become. The waitresses don't smile, the fucking female boss look like a mama-san, and I seriously suspect the chef isn't Japanese as the waitress had claimed. If a place serves horrible food the most you don't go back and eat loh. But this place is a fucking poser, cheat people money only.

So now, I'm fucking deprived of Japanese food. One fine day I'd go Iori to wack one time jia lat jia lat. If all the above still fails to stop you from patronising Shogan, then give me a ring and let me drill some sense into you.

Fucking Sho-simi-lan-jiao-gan... Sho kan and ho kao kan. Pui.